Something happened today that made me question my own behavior.

A young Muslim from Indonesia messaged me on TikTok. After exchanging salams, he asked where I was from. I immediately became irritated. I told him I wasn’t interested in small talk and asked what he needed. He said he just wanted to get to know me.

I shut the conversation down.

I’ve received thousands of messages over the years. Between work, writing, filmmaking, and running Stronghold, my time and attention are stretched thin. I have very little patience for conversations without a purpose.

But here’s what bothered me afterward.

The young man hadn’t done anything wrong. So why did I react as though he had?

I realized something. Sometimes we become so protective of our time that we start treating innocent people like intruders.

There’s nothing wrong with boundaries. But there’s a difference between protecting your peace and allowing your impatience to dictate how you treat others.

At 54, I’m still discovering things about myself that need work.

And perhaps that’s the real test of personal growth. Not how well we recognize the faults in others, but how willing we are to confront the ones in ourselves.